Lesbian Couple Felt Pressured by Fertility System – So They Went to Denmark

Danielle and Sophie are married and wanted to start a family. After three failed IUI-treatments in the UK, they felt pressured into IVF-treatment. They sought their fortune in Denmark and are now expecting their first child. They encourage other lesbian couples to seek treatment outside the UK.

In Europe there are huge differences between each country’s legislation, costs, and opportunities for fertility treatments for lesbian couples. In the UK, numerous tests, long waiting times, and high costs are a precondition. This was what Sophie and Danielle from Birmingham experienced. After several attempts at a private clinic in Birmingham, they decided to explore the opportunities outside the UK. After a single Google-search and a video call, the plane tickets were booked.

– Having a baby would be a dream come true for us, and we needed to be treated and seen and heard like anyone else who wants to have a baby. In the UK, fertility treatment as a lesbian is a long and costly process, and after three failed IUI-attempts, they wanted us to try an IVF-treatment. So, we explored the opportunities outside the UK and stumbled upon Diers Clinic in Denmark. This may sound clichéd, but we immediately knew what we had to do – we were going to Denmark, says Sophie.

Pressured into IVF-treatment

In December, Sophie and Danielle were in Denmark for the second time. Danielle was inseminated (IUI), and she’s now expecting the couple’s first child. IUI-procedures in the UK cost about 1.300 pounds per attempt excluding donor sperm, but the price in Denmark is less than half. In the UK, lesbian couples must go through six attempted inseminations, before they can receive government support. But in their experience, the British clinics pressure their clients to overtreatment. In Sophie and Danielle’s case, the clinic wanted to transfer them to IVF-treatments after only three IUI-attempts.

– Fertility treatment in Britain is expensive, and the three inseminations cost us over 4000 pounds. When you want a baby, the money is not what’s important. To us, the big difference was that we in Denmark didn’t have to fight for what we wanted. In Britain, we constantly had to defend our choices, and when the inseminations were unsuccessful, the system wanted us to transfer to IVF-treatment, says Danielle and adds:

– It’s important to me that the process was as natural as possible, and I was relieved to come to Denmark, where we felt they listened to our wishes. The second insemination attempt was a success, and it shows British doctors look squarely to set predetermined treatment plans that are often best suited for heterosexual couples, and not what treatment is right for the individual couple.

Denmark is a prominent fertility country

Diers Clinic in Aarhus in central Denmark offers IUI-treatments, and 80 percent of the clientele are from a country other than Denmark. According to the Danish Health Authority, nearly half of all women that are inseminated with donor sperm in Denmark are from a country other than Denmark.

– One can wonder why there is such a big difference between two neighbouring countries, but all our British clients tell the same story: It’s difficult and extremely expensive as a lesbian to go through fertility treatment in the UK. We can clearly see on our clients and procedures that there is a huge difference in the way lesbian couples are treated, when it comes to fertility treatment. Otherwise, such a large part of our clientele wouldn’t be foreign nationals, says Liza Diers, CEO and owner of Diers Clinic, and mother to three donor children.